Thu, Jul 19, 2018

Hello people,
here’s a little background about my post on the 4th July, the pic of the sperm monster attacking the Statue of Liberty. Well I can reveal it comes from the ridiculous comedy horror movie Chillerama released in 2011. The movie is a compilation of four short stories and the first of them features the sperm monster. The name of the insane short flick featuring the mutant sperm is ‘Wadzilla’ and it’s about as daft as you can get!

Chillerama Poster

OK I’m issuing a spoiler alert for those of you who might want to watch this silly but totally hilarious movie. Chillerama is set in on the last night of a drive in movie theatre, with the audience watching a quardruple bill of way over the top B movies. Wadzilla is the first of the four horror movies up.

Single Miles is in the fertility clinic to deal with his terrible sperm count. It appears that Miles can only muster one measely sperm cell per ejaculation so the doc prescribes him some untested drugs that will strengthen his sperm. However whenever Miles gets sexually aroused his bollocks throb in absolute agony. He finds out the hard way that the drugs don’t lead to more sperm, it leads to a mega sperm the size of a golf ball!

The doc is horrified and tells him to discontinue the medication and that if he ever gets sexually aroused again to immediately expell the mega sperm from his body. In other words, jerk off!

Rather unwisely, given the spooky problem with his testicles, Miles goes on a date. The whopping cleavage of his cracking counterpart sets off a volcanic reaction in his ballbag, and Miles has to excuse himself and dash into the bathroom. Frantically wanking he gives birth to a monstrous sperm which escapes from the toilet bowl, smashes the place up and tries to dive into his prospective girlfriend’s crotch.

Wadzilla Girl Attack

Miles wrestles with his sperm but the thrashing serpent escapes out the window and starts its murderous reign over New York, killing and growing with every gruesome death. Soon the mutant sperm is destroying the city and causing King Kong carnage wherever it goes!

Wadzilla Homeless Guy

Wadzilla eats car

Wadzilla New York

The monster sperm is enraged as it needs
to do what sperm do – find an egg. And the only female thing big enough
for a Godzilla-sized sperm to bang is the Statue of Liberty (which taunts and teases Wadzilla which a provocative strip show). The monster sperm shags the Statue of Liberty (see 4th Of Juky post) but is stopped in its tracks when General Bukkake
of the US Army blows it to smitherines with a mega tonne bomb. New York
is drenched in sperm, not unlike the exploding Marshmallow Man scene
from Ghostbusters. Its a city-sized bukkake but New York is saved!

Wadzilla nuked

I confess that I enjoyed Wadzilla and its 1950’s spoofing. OK, it’s not going to win any Oscars but far as monster sperm movies go it’s a blast and recommended to horror comedy fans, or fans of sperm everywhere.

Semen Simon

 

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